Saturday Blues...

oh no.. i was late to fetch my daughter to school today but looking at her, she is mildly sick, i thought of skipping her activity today as i woke up late... BUT i dare not to tell my daddy about it, i just told him that she is still not feeling well though, supposed to let her to have a good rest. i knew if i told my daddy, he would shoot me non-stop!!!!

*sighs* my daddy is always shooting me, never trying to understand my situation... thought his situation was better than me? *face-palm* anyway, i fed up the ways he talks to my siblings and me, every talks are different ways... and he never thought i am as the eldest should be respected as well not to be complained how i do, what i do and etc...

my sister and i are totally different, my sister has the nanny and the maid to take care everything. and i take care MANY THINGS apart from my family... yet my father seems doesn't understand... sad huh?

never mind... no comments about this.

people have money, people have no money - - - looks how people treats? much different eh?

oh well... because of this, i hardly to talk about my life / plans to my family as i knew this would be getting strong objections from them and they would not supporting me for sure as they look at our situations, never getting improved... so want to blame who?

*long-winded*

and now...

i am working half day today and it seems too dull for me as we all are busy with the convention. it will be held in 2 weeks time... yet i am still troubled with the "future centre"...

very troubled until i am damn not happy although my cousin brother doesn't understand my feels. he insisted to invest 100% on this centre and we would be working together. though this is may be cons and pros but i try to adapt as it is happening already. i can't just tell him directly that i don't want him to be my partner on this business...

:(

don't know how to get firm on myself... sometimes i am so "blur blur"...

haihh...

it has been a few weeks since we were discussing regarding the centre and my cousin brother didn't really bring up the issue to me, even hard to get him as he seldom check the phone... sighs...

so far, as i knew once he invests 100% on this centre, he might be the big shareholder, and i am just a small shareholder. after all, it seems he is my big boss on this centre though he spoke that he is indeed working for me???!! weird...

never mind, i let it go... as he has spoken that when the centre is getting stable and the profit is growing then we shall plan for another branch, by that time he shall give me back the shareholdings... perhaps his shareholding is reduced as i will take back he shareholdings in order to become a big shareholder on this centre. sooner or later when both centres are getting well-planned and growing, then only he shall returns 100% shareholdings back to me as this centre indeed belongs to me!

but i don't know whether shall i trust him based these matters???

who knows if one day when he changes the mind? i am doomed already by that time...

oh well... because of these, i am quite unhappy... have been bottling my feelings in my heart though i never share with people... i just shared with few closer friends so far now.

what a Saturday!!!


xxx

i am quite not happy though....

it's TGIF - - -

i am so stressed yet it's TGIF now...

can't imagine the time flies so fast and here is Friday again... everything seems to be difficult even more than i expected! anyway, regarding to business plan, i would have my cousin brother to be my partner for this business since he is investing 100% into this business. and i wonder whether am i regretting to share the matters with him?

i supposed to look for him to prepare the proposal for me since i have helped him a few times in the past, never expected he is interested on my ideas! don't know is a good signal or other round since i am relying on the proposal to lend the loan from SME Bank... and now it seems i don't need to lend the loan since there's an investor for this. i just feel uncomfortable as everything needs to be shared with him fairly... *sad* and i have no power at all...

how? this is my dream and it seems to be gone to him... i don't know lar because the money is the evil! whoever has the money, he will be powerful! right?

i don't invest anything and i will have the shareholding as well with him, just that i don't know how much percent i will be the shareholder either small or big? hmm...

looking at this matter, my cousin brother is not really experienced about the childcare and this is supposed to mine since i chosen this child care as my business. hence, now he is going to be my partner on this business, he is gonna to learn about the child care, education and etc for sake of this business.

i don't need anything, i just hope to have this business solely belongs to mine! does it sound like i am selfish eh? *long sighs....*

just forget it, i shall wait and see how everything goes...

praying everything goes well...

xxx

i dreamed him??!!

we just came home on Monday in wee hours around 2am as we were stucked in the terrible jam at Highway... tired and felt like lazy to bath but forced to bath as i wanted to refresh myself... ignored the kids as they were terribly tiring, knocked off very sooner after reached the bed...

oh well, after bathed and got myself ready to lie on the bed....

very sleepy and i can't take any longer to look at my phone, i gonna slept just like that....

*ding-dang*

i dreamed of him... Mr Dimple Guy!

weird?!!

"he smiled and holding my hand... then another scenes, he was kissing me... daannggg... he almost dragged me to bed... O_O "

afterward, i woke up because something bothered me...

then i recalled that dream...

i asked myself why he appeared in my mind when i didn't need him anymore.... grrrr.... i didn't sure if he had the same dream as mine? *wondering*

i don't know who miss who????!!!

*long sighs*


xxx